I guess sometimes we go through different phases in life, and sometimes you realize it, and sometimes you don’t. I know I sound strange saying this but for me, thats been the case. I suffer from anxiety, depression, and bipolar disorder. Not everyone understands me. I can be very difficult, and trying. Right this minute, I am in that moment, realizing that I am changing. I am getting ready for the next stage of my life. This comes easy to probably most of you. The transition process, but for me and those around me, its very dramatic. I remember my ex once said to me was “Tasha you have 6 different personalities and I really just do not get along with 1/2 of them.” “I have learned some of them, and I am ok with those guys. But I but I am not ready for another roller coaster ride.”
Right then, I had decided it was going to take someone must stronger, to handle me and help me learn. I thought if I could ever find someone who can figure me out, maybe they could help me understand me. Why for example when for me, things start changing, I become overwhelmed at first. Then I panic, then I lose control, then I become impulsive. It’s a spiral and I am lost in unfamiliar territory. I later figured out, it would have to be I that would have to understand who I am. But who was I?
I made a decision to take control of my life about a month ago. I wasn’t sure how I was gonna do it. I am still trying to figure that out.
and if you’re thinking which personality you’ll be following. Guess you’re on your own there, I never got them figured out either 😉
Heres an oldie I’d like to share with you guys
Untainted
My soul is a free spirit, it drifts among the natural beauties of the world. Earth, Wind, Fire, Water. It blends in to the core of respect for Mother Nature. She balances me, she cradles me. She shows me no diversity. I swim to her in my dreams and play with her holy water, submerging myself in her world. Drenching my spirit within her bounds of solution. I run with her like the flames of the fire, melting away my burdens. I bury my body into the earth playing with the dust as one day I will become whole and ground myself to her will. I play with her strong winds, floating through the universe spreading my energy around sharing the positivity with all beings. For I am solid, but one with her. My respect runs deep. I hold her sacred to my heart forever… connected as one.
Tasha Geller ( Billie Jean) ©copyright 2014
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