Hi readers, I know its been a while since I checked in, my goal was to write at least once a week. I need to dedicate myself more to it. I will work on that. But I thought with it being my birthday I would say hi. Currently I am listening to Fade into me, by Mazzy Star. Such a great song, I can escape this tiresome world just hearing this song it knocks over a maze of dominoes that lingers this wonderful given time into the air. It fills my lungs, breathing comes easily. Sometimes I will play it over and over again, yes I know its silly. Does anyone else ever do that, play a song over and over? Why is it that song, what is the meaning behind it. Why are you so connected to it. For me, being almost Deaf sometimes I hear a song, and its not the lyrics I fall in love with. Then later when I look up the lyrics, its like I knew that song and I were meant to change each other from the beginning. I can’t live without music, I think if I had to go through my life without music I’d die a little each day, until one day not too far away, my suffering would come to an end. It’s often my only way out. Some times there are days where I am running down this winding path, lost, scared, and afraid of tripping over my own feet as I tumble and make my way through all the limbs, bushes, and rocks. It’s like a bad dream I can’t wake up from. I finally run so far that just ahead I see a cliff. The crashing thunderous sound of waves crashing against the rocks below. Will I jump today, or will I sit there on the edge battle my cries and thoughts?
Heres another poem I thought I would share with you guys that I wrote when I was 23 years old. I was married to my first husband (34 yrs), and Danny was his best friend from college. I went over to his and his girlfriend Rheagans apartment. They had all these little blocks of words all over the refrigerator. I decided to write them a poem with the words on the fridge. This is what I came up with and I dedicated this poem to Danny and Rheagan.
Winter bares an elaborate whisper
To the shadow of love watching
Through a true purple urge
Music visions like a void gone away
A sad dream but sweet eternity